Answer key questions to get to know yourself

Trying to figure out what to spend your life doing without knowing yourself on a deep level is much harder than finishing a puzzle without knowing what it is supposed to look like. It’s based on pure chance. And your life is too important to leave it to chance.

The key to getting to know yourself is to ask yourself some hard, thought-provoking questions and answer them honestly.

If you’re a weird person like me, who does this naturally on a weekly basis it might surprise you that a lot of people find this tremendously difficult. For them, pondering these questions is to face their demons. A lot of people avoid thinking and reflecting by constantly making themselves busy. They are afraid of the answer because it might reveal something about them that they would rather not know about. They are scared of facing the truth. But if you want to have a fulfilling life you have to face the truth.

I was shocked when I first heard about the study that revealed that most people would rather inflict physical pain on themselves than to sit alone with their thoughts for 15 minutes.

Being alone with my thoughts and asking revealing questions about me and my life is one of my favourite activities.

Something that makes people nervous about asking these questions about themselves is that it will remind them that they're not following their passion. They would rather suppress their true interests than admit that they have spent too many years pursuing the wrong career.

The thought of spending even more years of their life chasing their new interest is scary. What if their new interest turns out to be wrong as well?! They think they are not smart enough to do it and they think it is too late.

This is so scary to them that they're actively seeking confirmation that the path they're already on is the correct one. So they read articles that back up this belief and spend time around people who give them the confirmation they seek.

If you muster up some courage and ask yourself some difficult questions, even though you might discover that your true interests etc don't align with where you’re currently at in your life, knowing the truth is much more comfortable than constantly having to come up with excuses to hide the truth.

Here are the questions. Spend some time on each question and answer them as honestly as you can. Also, don't forget to ask yourself why you gave the answers you gave.

What are you most worried about?

The answer to this question often reveals what you care about. There are probably several things that worries you. But I bet that it's what you worries about the most that sparks the most action.

For example, I worry about not achieving any of my ambitious goals. I’m also extremely worried about the environment, endangered species and the fate of the planet and humanity. But I’m also worried about some family and family friends dying before I’ve proved to them that I've reached my goals that they don't believe I'll reach. 

If you're struggling to find out which one is most important to you, ask yourself this question:

If I could choose one of the things that worries me and make sure it goes the way I want it to so that it's no longer a worry, which one would I choose?

Do I chose the one about the environment which would benefit the whole world, or do I choose to make sure that I'm personally successful and I achieve my own selfish goals?

The answer to that question will reveal a great deal about who you are.

If I were to relive one single moment from my life (and forget it after every time), which one would it be and why?

This will make you realise what you truly care about. But it depends if you have already had a positive experienced about something you mostly care about.

If I had all the money in the world and money wasn't a problem, what would I spend the money on and how would I spend my time?

There is most often a reason why you want money. Having money is rarely an end in itself. Unless you value.

And here is something to consider: Is there another way you can achieve the values that these things will achieve without having the money? Maybe there is a way you can achieve this without having to go through money first? Often, when pursuing money you might find that you are wasting your time because there is a better way to achieve your goals than chasing money.

We will dive deeper into that question in the next chapter which is the last and most important piece of the puzzle.